jukeboxemcsa:

There’s a moment, just as she hears her trigger, that she’s simply lost in thought. She stares into the distance, trying to remember, trying to understand everything that’s happening to her, and it’s all too much. Nothing makes sense. Nothing connects. Nothing fits into the pattern of her experience as she knows it. She pauses for an instant, but the fugue in her mind feels like it lasts an eternity.

She shouldn’t be naked. She knows that. She’s in a house that isn’t her own, wandering around without even a robe to conceal her nudity, and she knows that’s wrong. But it doesn’t feel wrong to her; she’s never felt more comfortable than she feels right now, displaying her body to her host and all of her fellow guests. It feels warm and exciting to watch their eyes, staring hungrily at her tits and ass and pussy. She can’t make herself understand why she wants this so much.

The slow, lazy course of her thoughts also distracts her, bewilders her, leaves her staring in blank bemusement as she tries to piece together why everything seems so hard to piece together. She’s smart, she knows it. She prides herself on it. But her mind seems like it’s filled with thick syrup, flowing sluggish and sweet until the act of processing information takes forever. She realizes she doesn’t know how long she’s been standing there, looking vacantly at nothing. She realizes that she’s becoming aroused by the confusion in her mind.

And the word. The trigger. It’s nonsense to her on one level, but there’s another kind of understanding unfolding in her mind. It’s a beautiful understanding, and as soon as it clicks into place then all the various mysteries in her head suddenly make perfect sense. She’s a good girl. She’s an obedient girl. Everything she’s doing, the things she’s remembering and the things she’s forgetting and the things she’s remembering to forget…they’re all instructions. And obeying instructions is always the right thing to do.

It’s only an instant before she hears herself say, “I hear and obey,” in soft, subdued tones. But it was all the time she needed to sink deep into trance. And all she wants to do now is sink deeper…and obey.

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