Neither of them really why she looked so skeptical … so defiant … at the end.
She already knew what would happen. She knew it was real, not some trick. She knew how her awareness would tunnel down to nothing. How her thoughts would grow all foggy before stopping completely. How time would pass without notice. How only the doll would remain.
After all, she’d experienced this before. This was not her first time. But it would be her last.
Maybe that was the point … that, at the very end, she wanted to cling to pretence one final time … a pretence that had kept her awake at night despite the looming pressures of the coming day … a pretence that this was being done to her against her will … even though it was her deepest desire to be unable to resist.
No matter.
Her features were already relaxing, her stare fixing on some distant point. Her awareness was already narrowing, and in moments would be gone. Her thoughts were already slowing, and in moments would be stopped completely. She was already dripping, and in moments would be too empty to enjoy even that.
Then she will take her place as just another doll in the collection.