fantasywifeuniverse:

Ohmygawd there you are!

I thought I had lost you. So, like, I went to go get a drink but like these totally cute boys said that if me and this other girl made out they would give us free shots. At first I was like, ugh, no way, but she seemed pretty kewl so I was like free shots, whatever!

Anyways, maybe she could come hang out with us later.

Oh, like duh, but first, when are you going to use that universal remote to turn me into, like, a slutty coed or whatever? Wasn’t that the plan for the night, stud?