Fun facts about Lemma the Librarian Volume Two: Stuck in the Middle:

• It contains three stories: “A Rock and a Hard Place,” “Sucker for a Good Book,” and the never before seen “Harping On About It”!
• “Harping On About It” is over 10,000 words long and the second-longest Lemma story so far, after “The Glamour-ous Life of a Slave”!
• It’s got serial recruitment, MF, FF, MFF, and MFFF in it!
• Other than the excerpt below, the only way to get “Harping On About It,” ever, will be to get the ebook!
• Which is only $2.99!
• And, this weekend only, Tumblr followers can get 33% off using the coupon code YP56V at checkout!

Actual excerpt is behind the cut!

…A tall, lanky young man in a travel-stained dark green cloak and cap sat on a pile of old stones, strumming a harp and singing wordlessly, while a little brook—barely a trickle, really—burbled away beside him as accompaniment. In the grass at his feet sat his audience: several hedgehogs, a dozen small birds, and two adders, all peacefully coexisting while they listened to his soothing, gentle song.

I’d heard of this, a very basic form of musical magic, so basic that every now and then a really good musician would stumble on it by accident. It was a kind of enchantment, enrapturing animals and making them adore the musician, but it was weak enough that even the instinctive resistance of an untrained human mind could shrug it off without noticing.

I sat on the grass with the rest of his audience to enjoy the beautiful music. I watched him play, his face a mask of concentration, sunlight glinting off the strings of his harp as he gently caressed them, letting wonderful music flow forth. I closed my eyes and let it wash over and through me.

I opened my eyes after a few minutes to see that several more birds and a stoat had joined us. As the last of my travel-induced tiredness and crankiness flowed away, I was so grateful to be able to hear such beauty. I couldn’t imagine what kind of man could create such a thing, just that he must be a truly astounding, wonderful person.

Oh fucking fuckety fuck, his music’s affecting me! That stupid Hragulf, I can’t even resist that?

The song ended, and he blinked at me. “Hello?” he said.

The effect would wear off quickly, I realized. In a minute or two the animals would fly off, and I would be back to normal. This feeling of fullness in my heart, of joy, would fade. “Don’t stop!” I urged him.

He smiled and kept playing. “Have I conjured you up from some dream, fair maiden?” he asked.

I know. Lame, right? A line like that deserves a scoff.

I giggled and played with my hair. “Maaaaybe,” I said. “Or maybe I’m dreaming.”

I know, okay! Gag. But at the time it seemed like the right thing to say.

His smile grew bigger. “Perhaps we both are. Perhaps all of this is a sweet dream that will fade away in the morning.”

“Are you asking me to spend the night with you?”

His fingers slipped, and with a twang, the harp nearly dropped out of his hands. The discordant notes were like a splash of cold water over me. I jumped to my feet, shaking my head to try to get the cobwebs out, gathering my magic to me—
But while I did, he recovered the harp. His fingers brushed over it again, and the sweet soothing chords of his beautiful song swept over me. I relaxed, let my magic drift away again. How could I even think of harming him, the source of such beauty?

“Interesting,” he said. “I thought the song did something like this, but it never worked when I tried it on people, just animals. Tell me more about what the music does to you?”

“It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard,” I said. “I love it, and I love you. I’ll do anything for you as long as you keep playing.”

“And if I stop?”

“In a few minutes I’ll forget this feeling, and then I’ll probably be very angry and hurt you very badly.”

He looked me up and down. “I’m not much of a fighter, but you don’t look like one, either.”

“I’m a sorceress,” I answered.

“Really?” he said. “Does that mean you can teach me how to better use this magic?”

“Hmm,” I said. “If you want, but it’ll take a long time. It might be easier for me to just glamour myself this first time, and then we can study the book together and I can teach you.”

He smiled and gestured for me to continue.

Right. What was the music doing to me, exactly? It worked a little like a glamour; the music was genuinely extremely beautiful, relaxing, and soothing, but it carried an enchantment that enhanced the latter two effects and redirected my appreciation of the song’s beauty to an appreciation of the musician. Yes, I could make glamours that did something like that: awe at his immense talent. Intense attraction to him. Devotion. A craving for his approval, a need to please him. I lay down the threads of magic around myself, binding myself in such a familiar way, but they were different; in the music they shimmered and vibrated, and as they sank into me their vibration flowed through me. He wasn’t just playing a harp anymore, he was playing me, my feelings dancing to his tune.

I told him so, and he smiled and set the harp aside. “And now?” he said.

I nodded. “Still yours, my love.”

“Then come here.”

I melted into his arms. My musician’s lips met mine. He was, I quickly realized, new to this, but that was okay. I taught him how to play my body, where to stroke and where to pluck, where and how to use fingers, lips, and tongue, to make me sing like one of his instruments. I thought I would explode, and I did, again and again…